Thanks to you guys, Translation Guy is the people’s choice in the Lexiophiles Top 100 Language Blogs competition. So we came third, even though none of the other blogs came even close in terms of response from readers.
The judges counted popularity as only 50% of the final score in order to control a selection process that best suited their agenda. Fair enough, it’s their sandbox. But count your matchbox cars before you head home, kids, because it looks like your votes may have gotten lost in the dust at this play date. So what did we learn?
Ever since I was drafted against my will onto the Unami Middle School Newspaper in 7th grade, writing has been the black hole on the event horizon. My name was my destiny―Ken Clark, Clark Kent. I would wear the newshound muzzle.
Frank Frietag, my Honors English teacher, who remained all his life convinced that I was an ass, was just the first splash of a wave of ruthless taskmasters who squeezed words out of me just as they squeezed their toothpaste out of the tube as they greeted themselves in the mirror each dreadful morning.
They weren’t all that bad, but I had to write as I was told. I was proud to be that kind of writer, making my living from the pen in the service of my betters, but I found it about as much fun as laying pipe in a parking lot.
So I started the translation business and stopped writing, unless I couldn’t help it. Being self-employed, I was surprised to discover what a prick my boss was. And he couldn’t fire me. Just between you and me, the inside scoop on this outfit? The fish rots from the head down. That’s all I’m saying.
Then they made me do this blog, but since I can write whatever I want, I write whatever I want. And that some of you have made it a habit? To have readers without editors! It’s a wonder! The judges at Lexiophiles disapprove! I wear their scorn as a badge of honor!
And that some of you like my blog enough to drop a line. Wonder of wonders! I pour over your every word, laughing and pondering every jewel and chestnut offered up. I sincerely thank you.
I vow to amuse you if I can, and edify you if I must. Thanks again.